Me, Jed and big Billy
\ndrove up to the
\nGreat Smokey Mountains
\nin North Carolina
\nto visit his hillbilly uncle
\nin big Billy\u2019s new Chevy car
\nhe loved like a baby boy<\/p>\n
when we met his hillbilly uncle
\na bearded old man
\nwho looked like a wizard
\nhe told us strange tales
\nabout creatures called dogmen
\nand said to not go into the forest
\nif we wanted to live<\/p>\n
his crazy talk about dogmen
\nhis freshly made moonshine
\nflowed all through that day<\/p>\n
I have to admit the old man\u2019s
\ncrazy talk was entertaining
\nhis moonshine was good
\nbetter than Budweiser beer<\/p>\n
but the wooden crosses on the doors
\nthe windows all over his house
\nand the two around his neck
\nwere a bit much<\/p>\n
but all the crazy talk became real
\nwhen we heard the heart stopping howls
\ncoming closer and closer from
\nsomewhere deep in the forest
\nscared, we peeked out the windows
\nsaw three huge, godawful creatures
\nhalf human half dog, glowing red eyes
\nsounds of growling
\nthe beasts creeping out of the forest<\/p>\n
when they reached the old man\u2019s house
\nthey started smashing big Billy\u2019s
\nbrand new Chevy car
\nthey banged on his uncle\u2019s
\nfront door<\/p>\n
big Billy drunk on his ass
\nnot afraid of anything
\npissed off about what
\nthe dogmen were doing
\nto his brand new Chevy car
\ngrabbed his uncle\u2019s ax
\nnext to the wood and
\nthe crackling fire
\nin his uncle’s fireplace<\/p>\n
charged outside
\nbegan swinging that
\nax like a madman at the
\nthree dogmen <\/p>\n
until one of them
\nclawed his head off
\nand they carried big Billy\u2019s
\nheadless body into the
\ndarkness of the forest
\nbehind his uncle\u2019s house<\/p>\n
we asked big Billy\u2019s uncle to
\ncall the police, but he said
\nthat won’t do no damn good<\/p>\n
the police ain\u2019t gonna mess
\nwith them dogmen
\nthey know the dogmen
\nwill kill them too
\nand they have wives
\nand youngins to feed <\/p>\n
we called the police anyway
\nreported what the
\ndogmen did to Billy
\nnothing the police could do <\/p>\n
in the distance deep
\nin the forest
\nthe howls started again
\nscared out of our heads
\ntrembling uncontrollably
\nabout to piss our pants <\/p>\n
we scrambled outside
\njumped into big Billy\u2019s
\nbanged up and dented
\nbrand new Chevy car
\njump-started it and
\ngot the hell out of there.<\/p>\n
Bob Boyd <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Me, Jed and big Billy drove up to the Great Smokey Mountains in North Carolina to visit his hillbilly uncle in big Billy\u2019s new Chevy car he loved like a baby boy when we met his hillbilly uncle a bearded old man who looked like a wizard he told us strange tales about creatures called… Continue reading