Message to Ruth

I kind of wish we could have worked out
despite me leaving you.

And I hope since you are no longer on
this earth you’re in a place like heaven.

And that maybe somehow through the
ethers you can read this message.

I truly believe that is possible. I believe
the deceased sometimes can feel

when someone is writing something
to or about them.

And I have what I feel are concrete
reasons for believing that.

I wish I hadn’t been an introvert and
you an extrovert that became more

interested in being out with your
friends than maintaining our love.

And though I had to leave you,
unable to cope with the loneliness,

and because you were never going
to change,

I felt bad for you when you called me
once in a while throughout the years

hoping that maybe we could get back
together again for another try.

I wasn’t being mean or spiteful when
I could never go back to loving you.

When my heart is broken by someone,
I just cannot take the risk of that

person breaking it again no matter how
contrite she seems or says she’s changed.

I just can’t do it.

But I was sad to hear of when you
died in your fifties decades ago,

and I hope you went to a better place
where death was a doorway to a

glorious life for you, and maybe we’ll
meet again when I go through that doorway too.

Bob

Author: BobBoyd

Age 80. Cancer survivor since 3 years ago. Work out 3 times a week. Ride my exercise bike 2 hours a day. Live a solo reclusive life. Retired a year ago from working with the elderly in a nonprofit. Started writing poetry a little over a year ago; most poems I write are fictional but some are not. Spiritual with a permanent spiritual experience. Write poems on many subjects. Always researching for many of my poems and because of my unquenchable thirst for knowledge. After reading and hearing about many near death experiences and death bed visions, I believe death is the ultimate awakening and the relocation of a lifetime. You may believe differently, but you have the right to be wrong -- I'm just messing with you. :-) View all posts by BobBoyd