Mel had an aunt he called an ant
Why he called her an insect
Is baffling to yours truly me
She hailed from Billings, Montana
Mel said she was like Bonnie
From Bonnie and Clyde
Robbed banks with a shotgun
And hand grenades strapped to her
A female bandito first class
A public enemy, never caught
Pictured on post office walls
So he claimed
When she came to visit him
She was just a gentle, little old lady
Probably not taller than five feet
And weighing in at a mere 90 lbs
Harmless and too frail for
Bank robbery and such
I called Mel out for his nonsense
He still claimed it was true
After his aged aunt or aged ant
Went back to Billings
The news on TV reported
Three local banks had been robbed
By a masked old lady with a shotgun
and grenades strapped to her
I still can’t believe she did it
I can’t believe it’s true
After all we’re living
In an era of fake news
And maybe jokester Mel,
Paid serious money for
Some news report fakery
Bob Boyd