Day: April 4, 2025

Supposedly, The Akashic Records are a spiritual archive containing the events, thoughts, emotions, and intentions of your life encoded in a non-physical plane of existence.

Here’s my business plan: Because any bad things you did, or even thought of doing, are sealed hermetically in your Akashic Record, you probably have mountains of bad karma stored in them.

What this means to you and why it matters is because all that bad karma could condemn you to endless misfortunes, miseries, and thousands of incarnations with little chance of escaping the wheel of rebirths anytime soon. But take heart. Help is a phone call away!

Out of the boundless compassion in my heart and my unparalleled generosity, for a mere $100,000 USDs, I will use my preternatural powers to pry open your Akashic Record and scrub all the bad karma from it, like Data Removal Services can scrub anything and everything about you from the Internet.

Believe me, this is literally the deal of your lifetime or, more accurately, lifetimes. And $100,000 is a pittance to pay for the cessation of your bad karma and the terrifying things that you deserve to have happen to you. Not to mention coming back life after life and walking into eons of misery and suffering.

To take advantage of this phenomenal deal, call 1-800-BULCRAP today before your next bad karma payback tomorrow.

That’s 1-800-BULCRAP. (1-800-285-2727). All major credit cards accepted, even stolen ones (The scrubbing will absolve you off the bad karma for the theft).

Akashic Records Scrubbing Service, LLC
666 Enlightenment Way, Sedona, California 86336

For years there have been many reports of UFOs, also called USOs, entering and exiting the sea, aircraft operate freely in the water and in the air.

Tim Gallaudet, an oceanographer and former Naval rear admiral told Fox news in 2024 about the underwater submerged objects (USOs).

And in a 2019 29-page report, Gallaudet wrote, “Pilots, credible observers and calibrated military instrumentation have recorded objects accelerating at rates and crossing the air-sea interface in ways not possible for anything made by humans.”

Since I’ve looked into these otherworldly matters a bit, I’ve read of other USO sightings, and these do seem to have some credibility.

But stranger and more bizarre than this are Ufologists who classify aliens into 4 categories: Greys, Nordics, Insects, and Reptilians.

This all seems so strange and like Sci Fi conspiracy theories, but sometimes “truth is stranger than fiction.”

Bob Boyd

I change into my gray pants
and my long sleeve red shirt.
I put on my black sports coat
and my ruddy blue Gatsby cap.
I hop into my 2008 Honda
turn the key in the ignition,
back out of the apartment
parking area and head
out onto Wendover Avenue.
Fifteen minutes later
I’m walking into Harris
Teeter, my favorite grocery
store. I amble past the
many shoppers until I
arrive at the ice cream
freezer cases. I slide open
one of the doors and grab
a pint of Haagen Dazs
Chocolate Chip Cookie
Dough ice cream. I check
out at the self service
registers, transaction
approved, and I drive
home dreaming of the
first Haagen Dazs bite.
And think to myself,
it’s been a good night out.
Sure you could say it’s
boring, but for me at
my age, it’s far more
enjoyable than when
in a dark ages part
of my misspent youth,
a night out meant
getting drunk and crazy.

Bob Boyd

Sitting in my second floor apartment on top of the street below, people taking leisurely strolls on the sidewalk, an elderly woman walking a pesky pug dog, an old man hobbling on a cane, and farther than I can see, people being born, people dying, lots of joy, lots of crying.

A ceiling fan spins tirelessly over my head, fish in my aquariums swim about, clouds drift in the blue sky, the earth spins beneath my feet, the planets in the cosmos rotate above my head, the universe expands, the Godhead at the controls, and I’m sitting here, heart beating, lungs breathing, eyes seeing, trying to fathom what this creation is really all about.

Bob Boyd

A lonely, monarch male butterfly sat upon a pink verbena flower pining for his true love, his magnificent, stained glass orange and black lined wings fluttering and emitting pheromones with the hope of attracting his true love.

A beautiful, female monarch butterfly swooned over his pheromones and his handsomeness. She flew to his flowered perch, her wings and her heart fluttering, and it was love at first sight. They embraced and made love for sixteen hours, as is the butterfly custom when true love blooms.

And though the monarch male butterfly only lived for two weeks, those sixteen hours were the best hours of his life.

Bob Boyd

He’d been watching her for a week, getting her patterns down, a pretty, single mother with two kids.

A serial rapist and murderer, he had to have her and her life

He knew her schedules, when she went to work, when she came home, and he knew she lived alone, except for two toddlers, and went to bed at 10 pm.

The night arrived when his lust could no longer be denied. This was the night he was going to rape and kill her, and maybe her kids, and vanish into obscurity afterwards.

She heard him breaking into her house when the sound woke her up.

She yelled, “I’ve got a gun! He yelled back, “I have one too!”

As he busted down the door, she began shooting. He shot back.

When the shooting stopped and the gun smoke cleared, she was alive and he was dead never to rape and murder another woman again.

I don’t own a gun and would like to live in a gun free society, but it cannot be denied that sometimes guns save lives.

And I can understand how some see the need to take extra precautions to protect themselves and their families. And I have no problem with that.

Bob Boyd