A Woman Named Candy

I heard a woman named Candy
talking on an old Art Bell Show,

and she had a voice as sweet
as candy.

I felt that she looked exactly like
she sounded.

Not that I’m psychic, but I just
got this impression.

And I wish I could have seen a
photo of Candy

to see how sweet I think
she really looked.

But that was just one of the many
wishes I’ve had in my life

that never came true.

Bob Boyd

In a Dream I Was Told a Woman Liked Me

I had this dream the other night where I met
a lovely young woman,

and I was a young man in the dream.

Next a friend of hers told me this lovely young
woman liked me.

Though it excited me that that woman liked me,
meaning she wanted to go out with me,

somehow I knew it wouldn’t work out.

Somehow I was cognizant that I was really
an old men too old for her,

even though I was a young man in the dream.

But the bigger issue is, why do I keep having
these dreams about women?

Not that I’m entirely complaining.

I just wish one of these dreams would go
somewhere,

like me meeting a soulmate in a dream
that I’d be with in the dream

and in the afterlife … forever.

Bob Boyd

Art Bell and Shadow People

I heard on an old Art Bell Show
how he once saw a shadow person.

The lights were on in his room at
that time but still it appeared.

He said he only saw it appear in
his room for a moment,

but it scared the hell out of him,
and he went and grabbed a gun

to shoot an intruder with because
he thought the shadow was the

shadow of a real person until he
realized it was a shadow person.

After that his phone lines lit up with
people calling about seeing

these shadow people too, but
nobody knew exactly what they are,

even a paranormal expert on Art’s
show.

Some thought they were spirits of
the dead.

Others thought that maybe they
were beings from other dimensions.

I’m relieved to write that I’ve
never seen any shadow people.

How about you?

Bob Boyd

Teenagers Working Out in 1962

New 200 lbs set of weights
A barn to work out in
Skinny kids pumping up
Presses, curls, squats
Eating soy protein pills
Big muscles guaranteed
Getting stronger
Working out longer
To look like Steve Reeves
Played Hercules in movies
Had the envied physique
Only had to follow
Steve’s workout routine
To get as big and as
Muscular as him
We didn’t know about
Genetics back then.

Bob Boyd

The Beginning of a Werewolf Movie

I’m watching the beginning of a werewolf movie.
A guy is driving his car into a dark and cloudy
night on a country road.
And I know what he doesn’t know;
he’s driven into werewolf country.
And I know he’s driving to his death.

His car runs out of gas.
He gets out of his car and starts walking.
Not surprising, about twenty feet from his car
he hears a loud growl in the forest lining the road.

I can see the guy’s last minutes on earth
have arrived.
Then a louder, scarier growl erupts, and
the werewolf busts out of the forest.

But wait, the guy surprises me.
He zooms back to his car like a world-class sprinter.
To my surprise, he makes it to his car, jumps in, and locks it.
And I’m relieved he’s safe.

But, gasp, I underestimated the werewolf.
With one of those blood-curdling howls, the werewolf
smashes the car windows, reaches into the car
and drags the screaming guy out of it.
And without any gore, without seeing what happened to the guy,
there’s no doubt he was ripped to pieces.

Bob Boyd